“When are YOU due?”

Today I was walking out of the bathroom at a therapy facility I work at.  An older woman was walking out of the locker room ahead of me, so I ran up to hold the door for her, and she turns back slightly and says, “When are YOU due?”

Ummmm?  This is a first.

I said, “ME?!?!?…… I’m not pregnant.”

All she said was “Oh”, and kept walking.

I won’t blame her as much as I’d blame someone who has all of their mental faculties.  First of all, she was well into her 70s at least.  She wasn’t even facing me, as she was using a walker.  It’s not her fault I was wearing a totally-not-flattering oversized Gap Body t-shirt.  And it’s not her fault that I’m extra sensitive regarding anything pregnancy/babies.  Also, I probably resemble one of the bajillion pregnant brunette therapists who also work there.  She must have thought I was someone else.

I’m not gonna lie.  It bothered me.  I went back into the bathroom to squeeze out a few tears.

Who says that, and then doesn’t even apologize after they KNOW they were totally wrong. I digress…

Today I had my annual gyn appointment/pap.  I go to our local Nurse Midwifery practice.  I’m not sure how I feel about them.  One of their nurses is particularly crass, and I’m not a big fan of that when you’re elbows deep in my NOONERS. (Thank you Stupid Stork.)  But today I had the nice lady.

The nice thing about midwives seems to be their personal touch.  They ask you how you’re doing,  how are you feeling, how was your year? After hearing all about our pending IVF, nice nurse gave me a BIG hug before I left.

I’m just not sure how I feel about continuing care there, if and when I get pregnant.  After paying top dollar for our potential techno-babies,  I’d kinda like to pay top dollar with the best OBGYNS in town, with all the fanciest equipment in their facilities, to ensure NOTHING can go wrong with said techno-babies.  I don’t know.  Does anyone have any experiences with midwives that they’d like to share?

Tomorrow is my mock egg retrieval, as well as IVF teach session on all the drugs/injections.  I can’t wait to shoot up!


4 thoughts on ““When are YOU due?”

  1. Yes! Yesssss! Nooooooners!

    I may have to dig up an SNL clip for you where they use this word wonderfully….

    I was once shopping, and as I mostly wear flowey hippie shirts the young and perfectly lucid sales girl looked at me and said “I mean, how long before you have to start buying maternity clothes?” and then when I said “no ma’am, my uterus is definitely unoccupied” she thankfully blamed my shirt before I had a full on meltdown. Oh, and it was the day I started my period.

    Fucking nooner.

  2. Ugh–that is so wrong. You are the second person I know that this has happened to this week, and both times the culprits were old ladies. I blame cataracts and senility.

    Good luck tomorrow! Blog all about it, please. I’m fascinated!

    • Right?! It’s funny, any non-infertile would have been horrified by the fat implication, but I was horrified for totally different reasons.
      Blog is up with today’s details! 🙂

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